
I'm sitting at the dinner table having a meal with my family when I start to burp loudly. At first I say excuse me nonchalantly and continue eating, and nobody says anything. After a while, I keep burping louder and more frequently, and family members start complaining about the smell. I get annoyed and say I don't care if they smell, I have to burp! I stop saying excuse me which just pisses everyone off even more. I make a big deal of the double standard of women being expected to say excuse me- if men don't have to, then neither should I! I even burp directly onto a bite of food, blow the burp onto it, and then eat it. My family asks why I don't find that disgusting, and I say that if they don't stop talking about my burps then I'm going to burp all over their food. Finally I get up to leave, but first burp loud and long and blow it in everyone's faces, followed by a sassy "excuse me."
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